Three Princesses in Waiting

Josephine's Blessing

2012-02-12T16:39:00.000-08:00

Last Sunday was Josephine's Blessing. It was a lovely day and we are very thankful that some family could make it. John & Kate came down, Irina flew up from Sydney for the weekend and we knew that Dave's Dad (Jeff or Grandpa) was going to be in Brisbane on Sunday so it worked perfectly that we could have some family there. David had told his Mum Evelyn to not bother coming up for it so when she was there on Sunday it was so exciting and the tears started to flow. There was three babies being blessed on Sunday and Josephine was the last, which was lucky because just before it all started she did a big poop and I had to rush out and change her. She really doesn't like to have dirty pants.

Josephine wore her dress that Riley bought her and her bracelet from Rie & Mikie (my parents). It was important for me to have both Riley and my parents represented on the day, as the journey to get to this point has taken so long and without them it wouldn't have been the same.

After I had Riley as I stayed awake all night I had a Hymn come into my mind but I didn't know the title of it and I didn't know all the words. I rang my Mother in law at 3 or 4am one night and made her sing it to me. She must have thought that I had lost my mind. Anyway back to the point I was trying to make. That song was the first hymn that was played on Sunday. I truely felt surrounded by love and family when I heard that familiar song. I knew that Riley was there with us and always will be watching over our family.

As Dave started the blessing, I sat quietly concentrating, I want so much to remember what was being said to be able to take it all in and be able to hopefully remember it all to be able to write it all down afterwards. I can hear my own sobs, feel Monique giving me a cuddle and then I hear it all; the words of the blessing my sobs and the sobs of my sister in law Irina. What a privlidge to be part of this family to have the love and support around us.

They understand the road that we have travelled to get to this day and can feel the emotions and importance.

After the blessing I wished that I could have written every word that was said so refect on it and read it over and over agian in years to come. Then a lady I had never met before came up to me and gave me a two little peices of paper and said 'I hope you don't mind but I jotted down what was said in the blessing of your baby and I thought that you might like it'. I'm so grateful to her and she will never know how much her kind act of service has lightened by heart.

This is the shorthand of her Blessing:

Josephine Adelaide Cummings we ask for a blessing of health and strength for a strong body & mind, kind & compassionate young woman. Others will be drawn to you. You will develop a testimony and love of the gospel. You will be surrounded by people but still remain an individual. You will become a worthy member as you grow & attend the Temple.

You are from a large family who love you and want the best for you, listen to their counsel. You will be an inspiration to your mother. Have a healthy relationship with your mother. She will feel of your love and also your sisters and ultimately your brother. Teach them how to love & be kind to each other.

School use hard work and prayer , whatever path you take you will be able to acheive with the help of Heavenly Father in your chosen profession.

Be proud of who you are don't be afraid to stand for the right. Be proud of your heritage. You are loved by your family and Heavenly Father.

Grandma & Josephine

Poppy and Irina

Monique & Laura

Porter Cummings

2 Months Old

2012-02-06T19:21:00.000-08:00

I'm 2 months old now and look at me, I look so cute.

I've started to smile more and more. I love to laugh at my Mum and Dad and my sisters. My most favourite thing is cuddles and I'm so glad that I get plenty of them around here.

People keep asking who do I look like, well I think I look like me.

I'll get my mum to put more photo's of me up later after I have my milk.

Josephine

First Day at School

2012-02-06T17:28:00.000-08:00

We now have two big girls at school. Both Monique and Poppy were super excited to be heading off to school for the first day. New uniforms, new shoes, new backpacks all ready to go.

Monique is starting Yr 1, and she is lucky enough to have some of the kids from her Prep class in her Year 1 class. Her new teacher seems nice and is full of beans, exactly what you need to be when you have twenty; six yr old in a room together.

Poppy's first day at Prep was a little crazy with kids and parents all squashed into one room, everyone with questions for the teachers and children that don't want to be left. On the first day Poppy was happy to be left but every day since has been a challange. Day by day it has to get better.

Why on earth does my little Poppy, that never stops talking, that is always so friendly and happy not want to be left at school. Apparently she is fine once she is sitting down but until then I have her pulling my clothes off. I'm sure the teachers and other parents love seeing my boobs jumping out of my top as Poppy pulls on me to stay. Today I put Josephine in the pouch so that I couldn't expose myself. One day I will be able to leave her to walk into the classroom by herself.

Poppy's super excited face to be going to school

Monique excited to not be a Preppie any more

Keeping record

2012-01-30T17:27:00.000-08:00

At church we are encouraged to keep record, to journal. Over the last twelve months I have been encouraged by friends and family to blog to keep this record of my family. To be able to look back on and see how far we have come. To see the up and downs and know that it is all part of the journey. It has been wonderful to be able to write, to get the crazies out of my head, to be able to write the story behind a photo.

Today my friends which have encouraged me so much, say good bye to a loved one. It is now that I can see the importance of keeping a family record, so when our memories fade from our minds, when life gets busy and we can't see the happiness through the clouds all we need to do is reflect on our family or personal journal to be reminded of the sunshine that always shines after a storm.

I always have a camera with me and Dave calls me Paparazzi, even he one day will be happy that I have kept a family record. For Christmas this year the girls went shopping with Grandma and Grandpa to buy me a Christmas Present. Monique gave me a photo of herself in a frame. Poppy gave me a journal and a pen. They thought of these gifts themselves, even the girls know the importance of keeping record of our lives and I love they knew I would love these gifts.

I kept a journal after my brother Kai past away and at some time I threw it away. I wish I had it now, not so I could relive the pain but so I could look at the memories which I was reflecting on after his passing. To know the words to the poem that I read at his funeral.

To keep the memories alive forever.....

How could you live after the loss of your soul mate

2012-01-28T02:59:00.000-08:00

On Thursday night Dave answered the phone, it was late and you know when you get a call late at night it is either bad news or family. Well this was bad news. All I can hear is him saying Lisa's Husband has died. What What are you talking about. I quickly grab the phone it is Chrish.

In October last year I wrote a tribute to the King Family (Lisa, Aaron and their 4 boys) when their son Noah passed away. I've come to know the King's through Chrish, Lisa is his sister. Lisa and I have spoken via the computer and she is such a lovely person and so supportive of others. You can read all about The Kings here and how they live and breath family.

I can not even put into words what has happened so I will use Lisa's
"Friday, 27 January 2012And then there were four

We are home from our holiday down at St Helens early unfortunately because my heart is breaking as Aaron passed away after 9 pm last night. I'm numb and feel physically sick and can't believe it. It looks like he suffered a heart attack. I know his heart was so sad after losing Noah and I'm sure that had something to do with it, but I also know that in many ways he was prepared to go now and has hard as it is to believe, it was his time to go.
My family was with me and thank goodness they were because I needed them last night, more than I've needed anything before. They gave me so much strength and without them there I know it would've been so much worse."

Chrish was in Tassie for holidays and here is his blog about his last day with Aaron one of his best friends.

It is all so tragic, Lisa now faces raising her boys as a single mum, her boys now face dealing with the grief of lossing Noah and their Dad within 3 months. It is all so hard to get your head around how much the lives of this family have changed so much in such a short period of time. How do they keep Aaron's memory alive?

If you would like to help the family in any way please find information here King Family Donations
This has been set up by another blogger and fellow Latter Day Saint. Please share this blog with others and know that this family is very much deserving of any support that can be given.

A window in your mouth

2012-01-20T17:52:00.000-08:00

A Blog Post from Monique.

How I got my tooth out?
I bite my tooth on my pillow, and twisted, it hurt a little.I looked funny I laughed.I pulled it out myself.I had another wobbly tooth and its really wobbly.the tooth fairy came and gave me a gold coin.but she didn,t take the tooth.I liked having wobbly teeth and it was really funny having wobbly teeth and it was fun. the end

Seven Weeks - I'm growing so fast

2012-01-19T16:45:00.000-08:00

My mum has had to put away the first 0000 sized jumpsuit, I'm sure she shed a little tear when she put it away knowing that there will be no more babies in our house wearing it. But hey Mum pull it together I'm seven weeks old, most babies are out of that size within a couple of weeks!

My sister Poppy made me a flower necklace.

Josephine

My baby is going to School

2012-01-16T22:44:00.000-08:00

Poppy has been my baby for so long it now seems strange for her to be about to start school. She is younger then what Monique was when she started and maybe not as ready to go to school. Or am i just trying to holding onto my baby for a little bit longer. Poppy is very creative and has a tendency to not listen or to argue her opinion when she is asked to do anything. I'm sure all of these traits will serve her well when she is an adult. It will be interesting how she goes at school. I predict that she will be very social, maybe not so academic as her sister. We definately won't have a problem leaving her at school on the first day, she is likely to find a friend and be sending us away.

This week being the week before school starts its practice week. We practice getting up in the morning on time, eating breakfast, having a bath, getting hair done, clothes on (in our practice runs I don't make them wear their uniforms) and be standing at the front door ready to leave the house as if we were going to go to school. On Monday we practiced up to getting dressed without their hair being done and today we practiced it all including the walk to school.

The girls think I'm a little crazy and they have even realised that not all kids do this, to this I answer 'Oh well, come on we have to get moving we are going to be late for school'.

Pity Party

2012-01-15T03:43:00.000-08:00

After a few weeks of living in my own Pity Party, I'm glad to say that the party is over.

I'm over feeling sorry for myself that I'm not able to drive, I'm over the fact that I have to take medication until we can work out what is going on. Yeah it is a pain to not be able to drive, it has been a month already and as much as it is a pain for me it is also a pain for Dave. He now has to drive me and the girls everywhere. He has to do all the shopping, all the medical appointments, all the swimming lessons, all the birthday present buying, all the little things which I just do without even having to discuss with him. I think this not driving is going to end up being more of a pain for him then it is for me.

I'm ready to just get on with it. We are at the start of a new year, school goes back in a week, Dave is back to work this week. It is time to start afresh and start the new year with a smile on my face and a go get them attitude.

Cheers to the end of the Pity Party an a happy New Year with a smile.

My Bestie

2012-01-13T16:19:00.000-08:00

This week I have enjoyed two days with my bestie, it was awesome to just be able to relax at home and catch up. It was also nice to see her little man again, he is so cute and the squeals of delight when the girls played with him were wonderful. I look forward to hearing those same sounds as Josephine grows.

Remember the whale

2012-01-11T21:53:00.000-08:00

The toll of a month off work and the girls being off school since the start of December is coming to a head. We are all at breaking point and are counting down the days until school starts and the routine gets back to 'normal'. We have dealt with the whinging and complain and we have had enough. How do you teach your children to be thankful for what they have. How do we teach our children that we are serious and have had enough of the shouting and complaining of 'Its not fair'.

Rip the spout off a whale to show them. Actions speak louder then words. In a moment of desperation the spout of whale got ripped off to tell the girls we have had enough and we are the parents, we have control and they will listen. Sounds a bit harsh but it worked and now all we have to say is 'REMEMBER THE WHALE'

Although the whale is Poppy's both girls where in tears when the whale got hurt. Monique through tear stained eyes said 'its not a whale any more, its a dolphin', to this Dave and I have to hold back the laughter.

Five Weeks Old

2012-01-08T00:16:00.000-08:00

I was going to write about my first four weeks but we have been so busy that I'm a little late. So much has been happening, My Mum and Dad and my sisters have been showering me with love. I really don't need to cry much to get some attention. I have them trained well. At the moment my favourite thing to do is eat, after a slow start Mummy and I now have the hang of it and I'm packing on the weight.

Here's some photos of the first four weeks, enjoy them as I change so much especially now that I'm putting on weight.

Josephine

Sunny Days - The Arrival

2012-01-06T01:30:00.000-08:00

So before I forget in my haze of lack of sleep I want to go back to the 2nd of December and remember the birth of Josephine. It was pretty much like the other kids in regards to how long it was and the pain. Why oh why do we keep going back for more. It is only when that pain hits again that you actually remember what it was like. For me it is usually at this point when I start to beg for pain relief. They reassure me that I'm nearly there and can only give me gas which does nothing but make me want to vomit.

Let me start back on the 1st December when we had an appointment with Prof, I took backup with me I was ready for him to go back on his promise that our goal was to get to 37 weeks. The back up was more to console me when he told me 'Lets just try for another week'. I was so thankful when he said lets do an internal and see where we are at and discuss the plan to bring this baby into the world. Butterflies, tears streaming down my face, this is actually going to happen.

Thankyou body for doing what you do best and being ready to go. I was 36 weeks & 6 days and 4cm dilated. I hadn't even felt a contraction. Lucky me!!!
Those happy words ' Lets get this baby out', where like the wind had been taken out of me, the relief, this is actually going to happen. As I had been prepared to be told to wait another week I was so excited and then had no idea when the induction would actually happen. Prof rang Delivery and said ' I know you guys are busy over the weekend, can be book it in for this afternoon or tomorrow morning'
This is is going to happen

The induction was started at 9am on Friday 2 December. As my labour are normaly quick being induced was no different. I'm not one of these women that have contractions 20 minutes apart, they start with a bang at 5 minutes apart and just get more and more intense. With Monique, Poppy & Riley I delivered within 3 hr or just over 3 hrs and Josephine was the same.

I won't go into the nitty gritty of the labour because frankly who wants to know and I sure don't want to relive some elements of it. There where however a few things which helped me through this labour and kept the fear of losing her away.
1. Monitors, I was wired up so that she could be monitored. We had a probe on her head and then I also had the things on my tummy, they were not taking any chances

2. Birth Plan, I have always laughed at women that write a birth plan, I think every labour is different and you don't know what you are going to get so just go with the flow and then you won't be disappointed. Now this is just my opinion but these women that harp on about having a disappointing birth experience. I want to say to them "GET REAL, you got a baby at the end of it didn't you". But this time I wrote a birth plan. It included a description of all of our kids, their names and their interests so that the midwifes could distract me if need be.

The most important information that I included was this:
Riley (Boy) born Feb 16, 2010 – still born at 31 weeks due to Feto Maternal Hemorrhage

I presented to the hospital as I had not felt Riley move, I had no other signed of FMH, no pain, no bleeding. I was told he had passed away after an ultrasound and I was left by myself and had to ring David whilst he was driving to tell him the news. I was induced that day and had a 3 hour labour. There is more emotion to this story but this is the most important information you need to know before meeting me. Morphine, water broken, 3 hr labour from time of induction with drip.

Labour Plan:

• Please be aware my history and the emotion of having another baby, the anxiety that I have felt this pregnancy is huge and I will need a lot of reassurance and I will not believe that the baby is going to be Ok until I hold her in my arms.

• I do not want to be left in the room alone.

• We are having a girl, we have called her Sunny throughout the pregnancy as Poppy 4yr old insists that is her name. It is kind of fitting, as it will be very Sunny & happy when we get to hold her and bring her home.

• Please advise if drugs or any other procedures are needed, we will make the decision as they come. I am not anti drugs but would like to try and get through without them.

I don’t want to have to explain my history whilst in labour. I would like there to be an understanding for all that enter the room of my history. I really appreciate that you have taken the time to read this and support us.

I gave this sheet of paper to the midwife when I arrived at delivery and told her that it was very important to me that every person that entered the room read this. I didn't want to have to explain anything if I didn't think I could. The midwife was super supportive and the poor student midwife is sure to never forget her first ever delivery.

3. My Mr Wonderful. Communication is not high on the agenda when you are in labour it usually goes like this 'hold your hand there and don't move it, count but count the way that I'm thinking it in my head not that i have actually communicated that with you but I believe that I have used my powers of mental telepathy.1, 2, 3, 4, ,5, 6, 7, 8,8,9, 10 which each breath, slowly to get me through the whole contraction not 1 - 20 fast what on earth are you thinking'. Some how after four kids he gets me and we get each other and we get through it all together.

Then just before Josephine flew into this world who should walk in for a visit; but Prof, must of heard my screaming, I mean counting. The midwife was very surprised it is not often that the Head of Obstetrics comes for a delivery. It really showed me I was in the best care, all this from a public hospital and me being a public patient. Got to love Australia.

You are in my arms finally, we never want to put you down. This really did happen, you are mine forever, we got through it. The relief, the joy, the knowing that you have been chosen to be part of our family. All so overwhelming.

I look at this picture and can imagine my emotions to be holding Josephine. We don't remember me crying like this once she was delivery but this images tells the emotions and I couldn't blog about her birth without this image. This image is the true emotions of what it is like to deliver a rainbow baby and have the love and joy for a new child but still long for your child with you held so briefly.

Daddy's girl, the happiness for it all to be over.

Choir Girl

2012-01-05T18:40:00.000-08:00

Monique all year has wanted to join the choir at school but Preppies have not been allowed to join until now. The first week she was late, as I had packed to much lunch for her and she was not allowed in. She came home very upset and told me that the next Tuesday I would have to do better and only pack her a small lunch with no crusts so that she could get there on time. The next Tuesday morning rolled around and she reminded me about the smaller lucnh so that she could make sure she go to choir on time.
She has been remembering and reminding me every Tuesday about her lunch and choir and she take herself off to choir practice at first break, which is at the other end of the school.

A couple of weeks ago she performed at assembly but I missed it not knowing it was her shining moment. I was so sad. This week I made sure I got to assembly just in case she performed again, I slipped in 10 minutes late in which time she didn't perform but got an award for being in the Junior Choir. I missed it again....

The last Tuesday before School broke up Monique had an eye specialist appointment and she was so upset that she might be late for choir practice. I raced back down the freeway from Brisbane to try and get her there on time. Ran into the school grounds and to the music room. NO PRACTICE TODAY.... was I just missing everything at the moment, come on. I did however get to speak to her choir teacher and be praised on how wonderful Monique is and be told that although other Preppies tried to be part of the choir, they all could not keep up and Monique is now the only Preppie in the Choir.

So proud of her that she found something that she wanted to do and kept at it until she was allowed to be part of it.

Wish I had pictures of her in the choir, better luck next year.

A long distance Christmas

2012-01-05T18:33:00.000-08:00

Being away from family this Christmas we didn't want to miss out on sharing the joy of the kids opening their Christmas presents. My parents having been up only weeks before Christmas spoilt the girls and they had a heap of presents to open. Each year it is getting harder to make then understand who has given them what, and for them to get a true understanding of what Christmas is all about when they are swamped with presents for us and family.

So this year we did presents from my parents on Christmas Eve (via Skype) and then presents from Santa on Christmas morning. I love Skype, I wish everyone would jump on board the skype train, it is awesome to be able to keep in touch with my neices and nephews when they are all over the country. The girls love to get on Skype and talk to family which we otherwise wouldn't see. My neices in Tassie have been able to show me their chickens and other fun things around their house thanks to skype and although I haven't seen the Tassie family for a couple of years it doesn't feel that way, as I see them on the computer all the time.

Heres to a very Skype Christmas

End of year awards

2012-01-03T17:44:00.000-08:00

Monique School Special Award Ceremony - I missed this but Dave and my parents were able to be there to see Monique get the Academic Achievement award for Prep. This award is given to the most academic student in each year and it is decided by all the teacher in that year. There are 4 prep classes so I'm super proud of Monique for achieving this award. I was still in hospital (the first time) when the award ceremony was on. We knew that she would be getting an award but didn't know what she would be getting.

Things I'm grateful for

2011-12-22T23:15:00.000-08:00

Christmas being only two sleeps away I want to reflect on the many things which I'm grateful for.

I'm grateful for my children, that I have been blessed with four children which make me the mother and woman that I am. Without my kids I wouldn't be who I am and my life would be so different I can't even imagine what it would be like. Even when things seem tough all I have to do is look at my kids and know how lucky I am.

I'm grateful for my husband that does everything to make my life easy, to provide for us as a family and gives me the opportunity to spend my time doing what I love the most. Dave supports my decisions to work for a charity, he supports me when I spend more then my budget, he support my parenting and he makes me laugh when he laughs at his own jokes. We have been together 15 years and I look forward to being old and looking back on our life together.

I'm grateful to my parents which always want the best for me and as much as it pains them that we live in another state, support us that we know what we are doing is right for our family.

I'm grateful to my friends which have provided endless support to get through this last two years and love that no matter what happens will always be on the other end of the phone. I'm grateful that they can see the funny side of life and can joke with me even if it is at my own expense. The jokes about putting my purple eye shadow above my eyes not below have made my day.

I'm grateful that I'm part of a big family and have married into a big family.

I'm grateful that I'm a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, since having Josephine we have had such wonderful support of meals and help with the kids from people at church. It has been really interesting to see people come to my door to deliver a meal and they don't know me or don't know why they are delivering a meal to our family. They just do it, as they know that there is someone else in need. I hope that I too can give this same service to people that has been given to us.

The list of things which I'm grateful for could go on and on but today these are the top 6.

I haven't been bashed

2011-12-21T15:13:00.000-08:00

Last week I posted about how busy it has been here with three princesses, well it just got a whole lot busier. Last Thursday Josephine had to be weighed and sadly she had lost lots of weight and we had to go to the hospital to be admitted to get some help with feeding. She had lost so much weight that she had to have a NG Tube to get the fluid into her.

This might seem like enough but then to add to the story after waiting around for hours in Emergency we were admitted to the children's ward. We were there all of one minute when the nurse walked out of the room to get me a breast pump and I had a seizure. They walked back in to find me on the floor having a fit. The last time I had a seizure was 2006 after having surgery and before that the first time was in 2000. Thankfully I had put Josephine down in her cot, I don't even want to think about what I would have done to her if I was holding her at the time. As I was fitting I was hitting my face on the floor and as a result now have two black eyes and a large lump on my forehead. It looks like I have been bashed. I was pretty much out of it until Saturday morning and now I can slowly piece the pieces together with large amounts still missing. On the friday I couldn't remember more then 15 minutes prior and was very confused.

Photo taken today 7 days later.

So for me it is back onto epilepsy medication which I haven't been on for the last 8 years and no driving for at least the next 3 months. This is going to be tough, not even being able to pick the kids up from school if it is raining or just duck to the shops to pick up a few things. I'm going to be pretty much home bound unless Dave can drive me somewhere.

For Josephine it is 3 hourly feeds of a combination of my expressed breast milk and formula until she get nice and fat and my milk comes in more. I have a cocktail of medication to get my milk going and I have to pump every two to three hours. Lucky I can't go anywhere, me and my pump are best friends now and will be for a long time.

So if you see me please know this was not a result of Dave giving me a back hand. Dave has been so wonderful, I feel for him having to try and juggle work, girls, me and Josephine. It just makes me love Dave even more when he does everything to make our life easier.

What a busy few weeks - Poppy's end of years events

2011-12-13T16:30:00.000-08:00

Over the last two weeks we have had so much on. The end of the school year is jammed packed with activities and award ceremonies. My parents have been for a visit, we had a baby, Christmas parties and preschool graduations. In the week that we had Josephine there was an activity on every day, other then the day that she was born, then this following week has not been much better.

Poppy Preschool Disco

Poppy at a cat

Monique as a beautiful garden

Preschool Christmas Concert and Graduation

First stop was a visit to Santa.

Some singing from the kiddlets, Poppy front and centre of course singing her heart out.

Poppy's teachers Miss Mel

Miss Kerri

Miss Sally

Very proud of Poppy, she has grown so much this year and has really enjoyed going to Preschool. Not long now and she will be in Prep.

Rie & Mikie always seem to time their visits when we have school activities on. They have not missed any school activity this year which is amazing as we live in another state. Poppy was so excited to be able to have them here and show them her preschool and be able to take them to her graduation.

Poppy Swimming Lessons
Yippee Poppy has finally moved up to level 4 swimming, some kids can move up quite quickly but Poppy likes to take her time. When she is nearly to the next level she then gets bored and stops trying so she stays down a level for even longer. Lucky for us we have found a teacher which believes in Poppy and knows what she is up to, there is no pulling the wool over her eyes. We have tried many teachers and Poppy tries the cute factor, for most teachers this works for a few weeks, not with her teacher that she has now had for the last 10 months, no messing around, no cute factor, Just results...

Sunny Days - 37 weeks so close I can almost reach it.

2011-12-08T23:36:00.000-08:00

Written on Friday between 12.30am - 1am

At the clock has ticked over to midnight on the 2nd of December I know today is the day that you will be born. I know that if we work together we will be able to get through this labour and I will feel the joy once again of seeing my precious baby being placed in my arms. I look forward to seeing the look of amazment on your Daddy's face, the only way to describe it is "Oh My Wife is the most amazing person ever", not sure he would explain it this way but that is the way that I feel when he looks at me after giving birth.

We went and saw the Prof today and he very kindly could see that getting to 37 weeks was pretty amazing and I have been under enormous stress. The last couple of weeks have been very hard knowing we are just so close but it all seemed so far away. Even know as I sit here in labour and type this out to I feel excited but torn about going to the hospital and getting this all started. At our appointment today Prof did an internal to see if I could be induced and what method would need to be used. Surprisingly I was already 3 -4cm dilated, I hadn't even felt a contraction. Lucky me!.
The plan is to go to the hospital at 7am in the morning and have my waters broken but I really don't think we are going to make it until 7am. This evening was Poppy's preschool graduation concert and I just had to be there so my whole afternoon was focused on being there for my girl. She had to wear a clock and cap it was so cute and they sung two songs. I'm sure I will post more on that when I'm not so distracted. All afternoon whilst getting the kids ready and going to Preschool graduation I was having niggiling pains but I could easily shut them down and could still feel Sunny moving so knew I had a little bit more time up my sleeve.

With graduation checked off the list and the girls shipped off to Mum and Dad who just happen to be here on holidays. My mind could focus on letting my body do what it has to do.

30 minutes on I'm know thinking enough of this distraction, it is time to ring the hospital and make the 1 hr trip. I need to be in control and have the monitors on me to know what is happening. Right now it is one foot in front of the other to try and get over the finish line.

Josephine Adelaide Arrives

2011-12-08T23:26:00.000-08:00

I have finally found some time to post, last friday we welcomed the arrival of Josephine Adelaide, you might know her as 'Sunny'.
Weight 3095
Date of Birth 2/12/2011
Length: 50cm
She is so lovely and we are so glad to have her with us finally. What a long road. As I have time I will continue to write about my girls and what it was like to be 37 weeks pregnant and then to actually deliver her and bring her home. The anticpation and emotions are something which I don't want to ever forget.

Here are some Pictures of our beautiful girl.

Sunny Days - A shout out to my friends

2011-11-23T02:41:00.000-08:00

I was asked by the hairdresser the other day are my friends getting sick of me freaking out about Sunny. My answer was not yet... Well I hope not anyway.

There are certain friends which know who they, which take the frantic phone calls, that send me messages each Thursdays after a hospital appointment to check how it went. There are those that have been through the loss of a child themselves and let me have a vent but also are there to have a laugh often at my expense.

It is the small gestures which mean so much, new friends and old friends.

An old friend which experienced the loss of her son gave me a book titled Pregnancy After Loss, it had been given to her and she passed it onto me. Earlier this year she sent it with her husband to QLD to give to us; not knowing we were pregnant at the time or that we had experienced two miscarriages. She wrote a letter which I have read many times, it talks not only of her love for us but what struck me is her observation of how strong she see's Dave and I as a married couple. She says together we can get through another pregnancy, so when I have no faith in myself I put it in Dave so that he can ride it out until i feel strong enough again. We didn't end up getting the book until September as her husband got heat stroke when he was in QLD. Then when I was in NSW in June we missed each other by an hour in our busy schedules. As the months passed by she kept the book and the letter and never rewrote it. The message she was writting was before she knew we were even trying for another baby but the message was written so perfectly that the time that passed didn't matter at all.

Trying to make new friends is one things but to try and make new friends when you feel like your world is spinning at a million miles an hr and the end is so far away and you are all consumed by what is going on that you forget alot. Being pregnant is one thing but this whole let me dump my life story on you is what most people would call high maintance but I have been touched by many people that still give me the time of day. I try to filter what I can so I don't seem like the nutcase crazy lady. Sometimes the verbal vomit of what is actually going on comes out and wow then I find myself in the arkward 'Did she really just tell me that' conversation stopper. Sorry if you are reading this and you have experience this. I promise I really am a normal well adjusted person. Those of you who know me don't laugh at this statement.

To the new friends thankyou for the smiles, the understand nods when you ask how are things going, and the distractions. I hope new and old friends understand that by writting this all down it helps me to get through the days and understand that the ups and downs are all part of the journey and if you are ever on the journey that I will travel it with you too.

Two friends encouraged me to blog this year, one was a challenge to blog more often so that he could keep up with that we have been doing in QLD and the other was a friendly suggestion that when I felt I could I should write about Sunny. You two will never understand how much you mean to me. Some how you both seem to know me so well and know what I need.

I understand that it is only me and David that is living this life right now, that to others they might not understand the stress that we feel. I'm very thankful to all that have supported us to get this far because without them I would have gone insane a long time ago.

Sunny Days - When is she coming Mum?

2011-11-21T16:37:00.000-08:00

Monique is asking all the time 'Mum when is Sunny coming?', to this I say soon but when we don't know exactly. I wish we did....

I ask Monique when she thinks Sunny is coming and last week she told me the 5th of December, that works for me. Lets put the order in and make plans for that date. Today she asked the same question again and the answer this time was tomorrow, well that works for me too. Best get to some housework and finish packing my hospital bag if my fortune teller daughter is correct.

Loving Sisters

Really they do love each other!

Sunny Days - Giving in

2011-11-21T16:23:00.000-08:00

There comes a time in your pregnancy when it is all about comfort. My whole life I have been unable to walk in thongs and therefore have had to make a decision each summer to find something other then thongs to get me through Summer.

Not this year, thongs are my friends, I have given in and bought myself two pairs and have made the decision to be a QLD thong wearer. The first couple of days were a struggle. I tripped over my new found friends a couple of times and even began to think there is no way that I'm going to master this. It has been a week now and my lovely pregnant feet are thanking me and thanking my thongs for finally giving in to the social trend and overcoming my life long issue with walking in what every Australian should be able to. Yet another thing which Sunny has enable me to achieve.

Sunny Days - 35 weeks

2011-11-20T00:41:00.000-08:00

Usually David would discribe me as legs a platform and a head but now I'm legs a watermelon and a head. Heres pictures from 35 weeks. Loving my new Where's Wally top. I have never been so big before, Sunny is going to be one big baby by the looks of me. My father in law saw me last week and said 'Wow you actually look pregnant'.

So now that we have got past the 31 weeks when we had Riley and the 34 weeks when we had Monique the count down is on. The final arrangements are being made and Sunny althought we don't have a name for you yet we promise that we will call you something once we see your little face.

Each week I go to the Dr and she is further down, the very smart Dr last week told me 'She is coming but we just don't know when', hello how long did you go to medical school to be able to make that statement. Off to see the Prof next Thursday and hope that Sunny is still cooking along nicely and she makes her entance soon.

The lack of sleep and anxiety just excelerate my need to feel her kicking but then the mind plays tricks and I don't know what I'm feeling and I find myself mind back to the days prior to having Riley and questioning is it all going to be OK. Is that actually movement? Why oh why in 4 pregnancies does Sunny's have to present me with an anterior placenta (placenta is at the front, so it masks the movements and kicks). Challanges make us stronger surely either that or I'm on the way to the loney bin, hope I can get a family discount!

Magic Blue Butterfly

2011-11-18T21:44:00.000-08:00

After we had Riley we tried to tell the girls that Riley will always be with them, I came up with a story about a Magic Blue Butterfly.

"Once apon a time their was a little girl, she had a blue butterfly when ever she was scared or sad or lonely the blue butterfly was always with her but one day she was really really scared, she really needed the blue butterfly. Even when you can't see the blue butterfly you can feel it. All you have to do is hold your hand to your heart and you can feel his wings beating in your chest.

Now you are very special to have a Blue Butterfly as only children that have an angel brother get to have one. I have one as my brother Kai died and you girls have one as your brother is also in heaven."

This story has been told so many times I can't count, the girls could tell you the story about the Magic Blue Butterfly. This story does not take away all that we tell the girls about Heaven and about our faith, it makes it easier for two little girls to understand that their brother can always be with them and give them strength, hope and happiness.

Moves in my jacket

2011-11-17T16:28:00.000-08:00

Monique and Poppy's favourite song at the moment is Moves Like Jagger but being 6 and 4 sometimes the words of songs mean something else to them. Everytime it comes on the radio in the car they asked for it to be turned up and they sing and dance along to MOVES IN MY JACKET.

Makes me smile everytime I hear it.

My Family Pictures by Monique & Poppy

2011-11-13T22:15:00.000-08:00

Monique's drawing of our family, she has included Riley and Sunny which is so important to me that she never forgets about Riley but more importantly is the smiles on everyones faces. And the love hearts in "I LOVE MY FAMILY!

Picture by Poppy. If you can't tell this is the order, Daddy, Mummy, Monique, Sunny, Poppy and Riley is the little circle under Sunny because he is a baby.

Monique did her picture at Church and Poppy did her's at Preschool. No matter where these girls go they will always know all of their family and how important family is to us.

Beach Beauty

2011-11-12T01:38:00.000-08:00

Last weekend we had our first beach day in ages. It was so nice to decide at 2pm to go to the beach and get there so quickly. Still loving being close to the beach.

I'm looking more like a beached whale these days then that tall classic super model that I see in my head, sometimes I forget this and get caught out. Last Saturday I was gliding like a beautiful swan towards to the waters edge (in actual fact it was more like a slow moving elephant), the man in front of me was looking quite intently at me and I thought 'Yeah 3 kids later and I still have it'. As I look down to check myself I realise he is not looking at me but the watermelon sized bump that is attached to my front.

Yeah you know it 4 kids later and I still have it!

Here is my real beach beauty

Sunny Days - A present from your Brother

2011-11-06T17:33:00.000-08:00

The weeks are ticking by now and we are getting closer to holding you in our arms. I really can't believe that it is only weeks and those kicks that I find so much joy in will become the cuddles which I will cherish forever.

At the start of this pregnancy after Poppy had named you Sunny I saw this outfit in Pumpkin Patch which was just so Sunny that I knew I had to get it for you. I however could not bring myself to buy it, I would walk into the shop every few weeks and look at it and I would pick it up, sometimes I would even carry it around but I would always put it back thinking that it is too soon to buy it for you. It is too important to buy and then have to take back if something went wrong. I resolved that once I got to 32 weeks that I would be able to buy it for you.

We had brought so many clothes for Riley and so had my Mum, they were all washed and ironed and in his draws ready for him to come home but as we know he never came home, he never got to wear any of these clothes. The clothes stayed in the draws for months until we moved. When we moved I couldn't face packing them away for good or giving them away so they got put in bags and brought with us. A couple of months ago Dave and I sat together and went through them all, to work out what we were going to do with all these boys clothes which we no longer had a use for. I couldn't face giving them to family members and friends that have boys knowing that if I saw them on them it would be very difficult. We worked out which would be suitable for a girl to wear which there was very few and the rest I gave to my sister to sell. I couldn't sell them myself, I couldn't look at another women with all the hope in the world that her child would have all these nice new clothes that my son never got to wear. To give them to my sister to deal with and also to get them out of my house was the only option.

The money that was made from selling Riley's clothes I knew had to be used for something good, something that would bring happiness. Something for Sunny from her Brother. So last Thursday the girls and I brought Sunny her gift from her Brother, her very Sunny Pumpkin Patch dress which means so much. I cried when I brought it and had to explain to the shop assistants why this nutcase lady was crying over buying a dress. Surprisingly they were very gentle and understood as one had also experience her own loss years earlier but had never shared her experience with anyone.

Riley I hope that you approve and that you watch over your sister to bring her safely into our family. I hope that you look at your baby sister and know how much you both mean to us. I hope that you are proud of the family that you have been born into and know that you will always be a very special part of it.

David's Birthday

2011-11-06T16:53:00.000-08:00

Once you are over 30, birthdays seem to mould into one, or maybe it is just because we are having so much fun now that the days fly by. I love birthdays and not just mine I love when anyone has a birthday, I love the food, the cake the excitement of giving presents. In our house for your birthday you get to pick your favourite dinner or go out for dinner and their is always cake.

This year Dave asked for Prawns with angel hair pasta, love that he prefers my cooking to going out to dinner. I surpised him with a homemade Pav, the first that I have ever made using Grandma's recipe.

It was delicious!

Sunny Days - 32 Weeks

2011-10-31T13:37:00.000-07:00

We have made it this far, past the big hurdle of the time we lost Riley, past the weeks leading up to the time when we lost our little boy. Some how I made it through, a little crazy and hormonal but what is to be expected of a pregnant lady. I have known worse behaviour from pregnant women that have not had to also deal with the anxiety of knowing it can all end in a second. The feeling of it can all end in a second doesn't go away EVER. There is no safe zone, there is only glimses into the future that may include bringing Sunny Home.

We have set up her room something which I felt really strongly that we needed to get done before I got to the point when we lost Riley. In my mind I needed to have this done as we had not set up Riley's room and I regret not having this done for him. When I was pregnant with Riley I had all this clothes washed, ironed and put away for Sunny that may well be the last thing on the list of things to do. If I flip things around it might just be OK this time. I have brought her some clothes and I have them hanging in her room. I have sorted all the girls clothes into sizes and have them ready to wash. Part of me just can't shake the thought that all this is wonderful but the end image of us holding Sunny in our arms is still so far away. It is hard to imagine what she will bring to our family. What our family will be like with her as a member of it.

So what now, we have made it this far does it mean that it is all balloons and butterflies as we prepare to bring her home. Now we have to deal with the fact that she can come at any time, there is no turning back we are going to get to hold this little wonder in our arms and I have to face up to the fact that labour will come whether I like it or not. As Monique was 6 weeks early and Poppy came at 37 weeks the chances of going before 40 weeks are high. When I spoke to the Dr last week I was told that 37 weeks is a target that I should be looking at but be prepared if she is ready to come before this.

My cervix is shorten which mean she is holding in there by a fingernail which is great, she can hold in there for a few more weeks. I will stop doing jumping jacks and running marathons now and let her just hold on tight.

I'm on weekly appointments now and have been for the last month. The weekly appointments have been a great help with getting through the last month, I needed to hear from the Dr's there is a really strong heartbeat there. I could listen the sound of my babies hearts all day long and if I had a doppler I would most probably be doing just that.

I have been asked a number of time if I have a doppler and then why don't have have a doppler.

Here is the answer, I don't have a doppler as because 1. I would want to be on it all the time. 2. What would I feel if I didn't hear her heart beating or the swishing of her cord, it would take me back to the day when we lost Riley all the fear and reality mixing into one that not all babies get to be brought home. 3. I need to trust and have faith that my Dr's know what they are doing. If I don't allow them to reassure me then no one will. If I don't believe them who am I going to go to if something goes wrong. This all makes sense in my head and I know not having a doppler in the house is a better option for me. I also have the support of my wonderful GP which is 2 minutes down the rd that he is happy for me to turn up to his office at any time to have him listen to Sunny's heart beat and reassure me that I can get through this and that she is alright.

The plan for now
Get through each week, keep planning to bring her home, visualise that she will be ours to keep for eternity, visual what it will be like to make that phone call the family and friends to tell them she has arrived and she is healthy and happy and we are happy and life is wonderful. We can't plan for when she comes so it makes it hard to arrange a family member to fly up to QLD to look after the girls so we have resolved to the fact that some poor person, is going to get a random phone call from us to come and look after the girls. I joke when I say this as we have had some genuine offers of help from friends that we have made up here. Our next door

neighbours have been great and have their phones on high alert for a night time call to come over and watch the girls.

This week I might just have to go shopping or I call this Cherie Therapy (My mum loves to shop when things are tough, it works for her and it works for me). Dave keeps giving me jobs to do for his work which I know he could do himself or get his staff to do, to try and keep me busy. I think really he is just trying to keep me out of the shops and keep our bank balance in check. Good Luck with that Honey, I love you for trying.

Chicken Dance

2011-10-31T02:35:00.000-07:00

Monique had an open day at school last week and her class put on this presentation of the chicken dance.

Beiber Fever

2011-10-24T22:49:00.000-07:00

Monique got a Justin Beiber CD for her birthday and a CD player with a microphone. Priceless singing for the last week. Baby Baby Baby Oh.... Over and over and over again.

Cricket Set from Daddy, he never gives up hope that his girls will be sports superstars.

Clothes and more clothes you can never have enough.

Sunny Days - Rocking Chair

2011-10-18T20:49:00.000-07:00

I have revamped an old rocking chair which I scored from my sister in law "Suzie", I'm not crafty but I think I have great ideas. I'm really happy with the way this turned out. Today I finished the birdie cushion. This sits in Sunny's room. We have all had a turn on the rocking chair pretending to hold Sunny and read her stories. By the amount of "I's" that have been used in this post, you can see how impressed with myself I am.

Next project........
A quilt for the bassinet, maybe a little out of my league but I can try, never know I might surprise myself.

Sunny Days - 30 weeks

2011-10-16T18:49:00.000-07:00

30 weeks, let me fall asleep now and wake with you cooing in my arms.

Sunny how you have grown

Monique's Birthday - Her Party

2011-10-16T17:59:00.000-07:00

My big girl Monique is 6 today, on the weekend we had a Hungry Jacks Party for her and 8 of her girlie friends from Prep. She had a great time and the squealing was enough for me to be thankful that the party was not at our house. At first I felt really slack having a Hungry Jacks party and not doing the whole thing at home but when I woke on Saturday morning to rain I didn't feel so bad.

Food Time

Playing Hide & Seek

Presents

At night I sneek in and watch you sleep

2011-10-13T19:02:00.000-07:00

From the moment I became a Mummy I have snuck into my girls bedroom at night to watch them sleep. I love how they each have a different way to sleep. The arms flung above her head Poppy or Monique in a tangle of blankets and legs twisted this way and that. I can look into their faces and see my babies which are growing so fast that I want to capture every moment. I don't want to imagine what they will be like as teenagers or as adults I just want to be able to see their sweet innocent faces sleeping every night.

I look at them and know that they are capable of anything and only imagine the wonderful impact that they will have on others if they only put their minds to good, not evil. I wonder when are they going to wake up and catch me and tell me to leave them alone. For how many more years will I be able to sneak into their room and watch them sleep.

Monique 3 weeks old

Monique 12 months old

Monique 18 mths old

Poppy 3 weeks old

Poppy 3 yrs old

After a crazy day or school, preschool, a trip to the shops, dinner, bath and all the aguments and laugher in between. I love to take the small moment of watching them sleep. The peacefulness is amazing.....

Inspiring family - The Kings

2011-10-12T21:00:00.000-07:00

I can't go through today without a special mention to a very inspiring family, The King Family. One of my very good friends is Chrish he has featured on this blog many times, his Sister Lisa and her family today have to do the very sad thing that no parent wants to ever imagine doing and lay their child to rest. On 8th October their son Noah passed away at 10 yrs old. Over the last twelve months Lisa has become a friend to me and at times I think she and Simone (Chrish's cousin) are the only ones that read my blog.

So today I think of Lisa and Aaron and their very caring boys and know that rainbows will only shine for them today. That with the love and support of their Tassie family and friends they will get through today and with the love and support or their friend and family they will get through the hard days, months and years ahead.

Check out Lisa's blog HERE The images of her boys and their brother are amazing and the saying a picture tells a thousand words truely applies.

A peaceful walk in the rainforest

2011-10-09T23:33:00.000-07:00

When Chrish was up recently on his last day here we took a drive up the Mountain to see if we could find a waterfall to take some photos of. Dave was at work for the day, so once again he misses out on an adventure. What should have been a peaceful walk in the rainforest was actually a loud walk with Poppy whom was so worried about losing Monique in the forest that every time Monique was more then 3 steps ahead would have a heart attack. Peaceful with a 4 yr old is like peaceful with a ticking time bomb. We walked down to the falls which on the sign said it was only 500m but by the Poppy metreage it equates to about 15 freak outs. Once we got down to the falls she calmed down so thankfully the walk back up was a lot more peaceful.

We couldn't be the only ones taking photos so the girls had to have a go also.

Photo by Monique

Photo by Poppy

Photo by me, I love when Poppy wears these headbands they so represent her personality of being bright and out there.

Chrish wanted to work out how to make the water freeze and I really suprised myself and work it out after a few goes.

Still need more practice but I was impressed that I remembered how to do this from what I was taught at photography at school, so many years ago.

Photo taken by Poppy

Chrish & the Girls

Sunny Days - How am I meant to know

2011-10-05T17:15:00.000-07:00

How am I meant to know if something is wrong when last time I didn't know until it was to late. What am I meant to be looking for, what should I have looked for last time. I'm well and truely past thinking I could have done something to prevent Riley from passing away. I have played the days over and over in my head, leading up to when I took myself to hospital with a feeling something was wrong. There is not one thing which I can say was an indicator that he was slowly or very fastly slipping away from us.

The only indicator was the lack of movement, so now with every movement or lack of movement I think is that a change in movement, should I be worried about it. A friend of mine which is also an angel parent told me when she was pregnant again after her loss that what got her through was saying 'God could not give me another dead baby', I know God is merciful and we only get what we can deal with but we only know what we can deal with once we have been dealt that hand. I question my strength at the moment. I don't pray for a healthy baby I just pray for strength to be able to deal with the day. For I know that only God knows my inner strength and what I'm capable for doing, he will only give me what I can deal with, and in this I must trust.

After we lost Riley I took a break from teaching at church I just couldn't face it. I loved my class of Young Single Adults (18 - 30yr olds not married) and they gave us such wonderful support in the days and months after we had Riley. One week I found that I had to teach, I think Dave was going away or was sick or something which meant I was the only option at short notice. It was the best thing to do that day. I read the lesson and knew it was my time to have faith that I was capable of then more then I felt at the time. All because of this quote:

It is referring to Joseph and his treatment and his steadfast faith.

"The ability to turn everything into something good appears to be a godly characteristic. Our Heavenly Father alwyas seems able to do this. Everything, no matter how dire, becomes a victory to the Lord. Joseph, although a slave and wholly undeserving of this fate, nevertheless remained faithful to the Lord and continued to live the commandments made something very good of his degrading circumstances. People like this cannot be defeated"
Elder Hartman Rector Jr.

On a day like today when I feel emotional I feel prompted to read this and know
'Today will NOT be the day that I'm defeated'

Sunny Days - Keep Busy

2011-10-02T22:46:00.000-07:00

First day of the girls back at school and although the house is a bomb I just want to take a few minutes to breath in the quite of the day. Now that minute is gone it is time to get busy, to distract my mind of the fact that we have made it to 28 weeks and the time that we lost Riley is getting closer.

My mind is full of thoughts and I find myself woken by nightmares when I sleep. Surprisingly the nightmares are not about losing Sunny but losing everything else from the kids to friends. I wake with cries at night and screaming. Dave is learning to sleep through them but I'm sure they are taking a toll on him also.

So I take myself back to my coping tactics and try and find a way to get through the days to get to the end of this pregnancy and bring Sunny Home. Keeping busy seems to be working for me and having some sort of control of my day also helps. This might sound a little OCD but I say go with that is working. I have made a list of things to keep me busy for the next 9 weeks so that I can have some focus when the crazies take hold. Being busy doesn't make them go away but it makes me feel in control of my life and more organised. I know Dave would love for me to be more organised, hopefully some of these changes will stick for the long term. I have been a messy person and unorganised person for the last 33 years, I don't hold high hopes for these to stick so be better enjoy it whilst it lasts.

It is amazing what you can get done with no one else in the house. Floors are clean, toilets done, Kitchen clean. Wow this is more like it, who would have thought I could get so much done in one day without the girls making a trail of mess in my wake.

How on earth are be going to get through the Christmas School holidays, 6 weeks.........

Strawberry Farm

2011-09-28T15:15:00.000-07:00

Chrish came for a visit last weekend and as it is school holidays we did some fun free activities to keep the kids busy whilst he was here. Really close to us is Strawberry Farm, which is not actually a Strawberry Farm but was as some time in the past. It has farm animals and the girls just love to go and have a play with them.

The poor duck had Poppy chasing it.

Then Monique joined in. Surely they can't be the first kids to try and catch it.

Chrish made a new friend, she got a little friendly. We all joked that it is his girl friend named Gertie. I laughed all afternoon about Chrish and Gertie. I'm still laughing when I see these photos again.

Gertie giving Chrish a little nudge after he rejected her...

Poppy our future Photographer

Nieces & Nephews

2011-09-27T19:47:00.000-07:00

Being from a big family and then marrying into an even bigger family has lots of benefits, one being an Aunty to 9 Nieces and 5 Nephews. They range in age the youngest being 3 months old and the oldest being 18. I can't believe that I have an 18 yr old Nephew which is just about to finish school. Oh I remember when he lived with us and I got to bath him at night and get so many cuddles. Now he has just been crowned formal king. Where as the time gone.....

Enough of the reminising, we had Dave's brother Craig and his wife Irina stay with us a couple of weekends ago. I didn't take many photos as I was not feeling the best, as I had the flu and felt like my head was going to explode with snot. Here are the few photos which I took.

Chloe eating cream

Dave & Marina

Dave, Marina & Poppy. Poppy just loved having Marina in the house and was all over her, all the time, which got a big much for Marina. It was like a little taste of what she will be like when Sunny is born.

Boating on the Broadwater

2011-09-27T01:35:00.000-07:00

A few weekends ago we had family come for a visit, so to make the most of our beautiful weather we hired a boat for the day and headed out to the broadwater at Surfers Paradise. It was a lovely day, even though I had a cold and was not really feeling the best. The boat was a pontoon with a BBQ, Dave had joked all week that it was the party boat. It may have been for the group of American's we saw on the water but with kids on the boat it was really relaxing and safe for the kids to run around and have a play..

Our Captain & First Mate

Hostest with the mostest

Our view

Laura little bit cold after going for a swim

Chloe all rugged up after her swim

Brothers

I love having photos of Dave & his family together as we always have such a great time with them all and it is so rare now that we all come together. Here is Dave and John & Craig.

Smile Photography Competition

2011-09-25T15:24:00.000-07:00

I have entered a few photos in the Smile Photography Competition. These are my favourite photos that I have taken this year. If you can vote for them that would be great, just click on the links.
Happy Day
Ekka
Looking for Fairies
Never Ending Love
Busy Hands
Innocent
A face to make you smile
Slaying the Dragon
The eyes
Sisterly Love

Sunny Days - Get me through the day

2011-09-22T16:31:00.000-07:00

26 weeks

This is Sunny at 26 weeks 6 days with her finger in front of her nose

We have made it past 25 weeks such a big milestone to be able to get this far and we are now 27 weeks today.
The last few weeks have been busy with family visiting and us travelling down to Sydney which has been a wonderful distraction. At our last ultrasound we were told that Sunny has fluid on her heart. I had luckily taken Aunty Mim with me to this appointment, how did I feel.... like it was all happening all over again. I reach out my hand to hold Aunt Mim's hand and said I can't do this again. Dave quickly came up to the hospital and thankfully we were very quickly seen by the fetal cardiologist and told that it is within 'normal' and we will not need to see him again unless there is an increase or Sunny has a Heart Murmur after birth. After this we had to wait one week to get some bloods back to make sure I didn't have some virus to cause any issues with Sunny's, heart all came back clear. Yippee...
Fetal Maternal Haemorrhage is very rare and they don't know why it happened to Riley so it is hard to know if it is gong to happen again. At the hospital I see a specialist team for Sunny, the Sonographers are fasinated to see my case as they don't get to see them often. I have been give stats like 1 in 2000 and for it to happen again is like being struck by lightning twice. These stats might seem like good odds but as they come with so much uncertainty and lack of knowledge as to why we lost Riley they mean nothing to me. Unless someone can say 100% we are going to bring Sunny home, give me a date and some facts as to why we will and not give me any facts as to why we will not then I'm not going to believe it until it happens.

Yesterday we had a great scan and all is going well and Sunny is growing as she should, there is nothing that is indicating that anything but a healthy baby is in there growing. Yeah great right then why in my head does it take me back to being pregnant with Riley at the same age and everything was fine to only weeks later to loss him. I know the build up to 31 weeks in Sunny's pregnancy is going to be hard and I can only get through it day by day. I need distractions and lots of them to get me through this. Give me a project please to save my sanity.

Now I find myself at a loss for my next goal and just looking at the end of this pregnancy and knowing I have to keep going, there is no turning back and I really have to deliver Sunny. It is a like an alarm in my head that has just gone off saying this is real.

I can't wait to meet you Sunny Girl.

She looks like she has chubby cheeks, Oh and those kissable lips.

Harrison

2011-09-20T14:56:00.000-07:00

Some Pictures of my nephew Harrison, at 3 months old. He is just such a delight and we miss seeing him grow and his parents so much. I wish I could have a whole day to take photos of my Nephews and Neices but our trips back home are always so rushed.

Poppy loves babies and can't wait until we get to bring Sunny home. She just wants to touch and sing to babies. I can't wait to see her with her own baby sister.

She is trying to get his dummy to put it back in his mouth.

My Beautiful Family, More Photos

2011-09-19T14:54:00.000-07:00

My Beautiful Family

2011-09-19T05:43:00.000-07:00

I love to take photos and my family get abit sick of it, here are some of my favourites from our last trip away. I love how a simple trip to the park to feed the ducks can be such fun.

Dave is smiling as he was throwing bread at me to tell me enough photos already.

More photos to come........

Feed her to the crocodile & Dora Show

2011-09-18T15:30:00.000-07:00

What do you do when there is a giant crocodile, feed your child to it of course.

Monique the crocodile hunter

To break up our drive to Sydney we stopped at Newcastle and went to the Dora Show, you can just see the excitement before the show started.

Book Parade

2011-09-14T23:32:00.000-07:00

We had Book Parade today, we have waited all year for this or more correctly I have waited all year for this. We have only had a weeks notice, but within that week we have been away for five days. Last week in my super organisation I convinced Monique to go at Babar as I knew that my sister had an elephant costume. Easy we will see her whilst we are away and I don't have to think about it. Plans sorted, all organised. Until I get back from Sydney on Tuesday night at 9pm and realise I have forgotten to get the elephant costume and the book parade was on Thursday. We have a very large dress up box, thanks to my Mums very clever sewing & and some items we have bought. We have Pocohontas, Snow White, Jasmin, Buzz and Woodie, a genie, a fairy, a doctor, Belle, and Cinderella.

So what did Monique want to go as.... Firstly it was Angelina Ballerina but after my fretting of how on earth am I going to make a convining mouse tail. I convinced Monique that FANCY NANCY was a better option. If you haven't read FANCY NANCY, it is about a little girl that like all things fancy and speaking french because french is fancy. My girls love her and we often refer to plain things as fancy so that the girls will try them as fancy Nancy would do it. It is quite funny to her my football playing husband referring to things as 'Fancy'.

To convince Monique I told her I would make her a skirt to wear and get her some extra fancy accessories. Monique designed the skirt and gave me a picture of what she would like me to make. I'm lucky to know how to turn on my sewing machine (which is over 30 years old) and sew a straight line, therfore to try and work out how to make a skirt at 4pm the day before the Book Parade could have been a mistake but I managed to pull it off thanks to some very old fabric and some elastic I had from making head bands last year. Monique loved it and has not taken the skirt off or her crown or anything else. So glad that she loves it.

Poppy had to dress up of course, she does most days of the week, today she was a ballerina.

Sunny Days - 24 Weeks

2011-09-03T21:41:00.000-07:00

Sunny we have made it to 24 weeks, it has been a long road so far with Mummy pushing and prodding you every day. Making you have a sugar overload so that you will move and shaking you around with a truck load of anxiety. Every time you kick I breath a little better, keep kicking my Sunny girl, keep me up all night with your kicking if you need to. It is only when you kick that I know that you are OK. I can't wait to hold you in my arms and feel your skin on mine. I wish the next 13 - 16 weeks will pass in a blur so that it will only feel like tomorrow that I will have you here. If only I would have a little window in my belly to see what you are doing and how you are laying. The last two weeks have dragged for me and I just want to get you to 25 weeks so then at least your will have a chance if you are born early. I know this is not the best for you and it is better that you stay in for as long as possible, so lets work together and get through this pregnancy. I promise to keep giving you food and water and keep you warm inside as long as you need me, you just keep growing and keep kicking to tell your Mummy that it is not long before you will be ours to keep and watch grow forever.

The Beaver

2011-09-01T01:18:00.000-07:00

Poppy has many names one of which is Beaver. Since she was much smaller then what she is now she was always busy. Busy like a Beaver. So here is the Beav being a Beaver (WITH CARROT STICKS).

She is going to hate these pictures when she is older, in thinking she is going to hate being called 'The Beav' too.

Losing Track

2011-08-29T19:43:00.000-07:00

Busy Busy life, each day I write a to do list and sometimes I get through it other times I'm so busy that I lose my to do list and end up doing a whole heap of other things I need to do which may or may not have been on my to do list in the first place. Only to get to the next day and write another to do list and start the cycle all over again.

I few weeks ago I sat at church and listened to a talk by a young mum of two boys about how we raise our families and how busy our lives can get. I have been thinking about her talk since then and she made a wonderful point, we write a to do list but do be write a TO BE LIST.
As a women what do I want to be?
As a mother what do I want to be?
As a wife what do I want to be?
As a friend what do I want to be?
These question make you think about yourself and what you are leaving with each person you touch. In High School it is all about making an impression about being in the 'In Crowd', as you get older you realise these things don't really matter. Althrough it might take some of us longer to realise this then others ( me included, no judgement in that comment). I wish I had asked myself these questions when I was at High School, when i was in my 20's, not sure if it would have changed who I am today but it would have changed the journey.

EKKA

2011-08-29T03:37:00.000-07:00

Being Queenslanders now we had to experience the EKKA, which is like the Sydney Royal Easter Show other then you can actually walk around.Here are some photo's and my attempt to edit the images. I hope to in the future have the time and patience to edit my photos properly. But for now I like the carnival effect that I have created with these.

These have not been edited but I love the the girls faces as I was trying to take a nice photo of them and David. All I can say is at least they love each other.

Sunny Days - Face The Fear

2011-08-24T23:19:00.000-07:00

We are now on fortnightly ultrasounds for Sunny which is wonderful that I get to see her beautiful face every two weeks. She is just so lovely and I just can't wait to be able to carry her out of the hospital in my arms, all safe and sound and healthy. To be able to trace my fingers over her nose and those kissable lips.

With ultrasounds every two weeks it means I will have to be doing them alone, which takes me back to having Riley and waiting for the bad news that would tell us he had passed away. You would think that having such regular ultrasounds is reassuring and it is, but I know that it can all change without notice. You can go from having movements and a heartbeat to heart break, So while it is great to see her every second Thursday and be able to get a great collection of photos, that reassurance doesn't last long. I soon enough find myself waiting for the movements to tell me she is still in there and alive.

The care I'm getting at the hospital is fantastic and the Fetal Medicine Unit which does the ultrasounds are obviously more accustom to high risk pregnancies and what it feels like to be going back for round 2 after a loss. They give you the time you need, they answer all your questions and they ask the right questions. I feel very blessed to be able to go to a great hospital and get great care and all due to a wonderful GP which listened to me and knew that our local hospital would not cut the mustard for us. I must also note this is all through the public system. I don't think I would have got the same care if I had gone private. What a wonderful country I live in to be able to have this service.

Now onto the photos, in my scatterbrain I forgot to ask for the photos on disc this time so here are a few of Sunny which have been printed and then I have photographed.

She is just the cutest darling Sunny ever.

9 Inches?

2011-08-23T20:54:00.000-07:00

Anyone that is an AFL fan will see the funny side of this picture. Only on the Gold Coast!

Ready to Ride

2011-08-19T23:43:00.000-07:00

One of the many benefits of being pregnant is I don't have to go on the rides at the theme parks. Dave is not a massive fan of rides that spin you around and around but these are the things that we do for our kids. The pictures tell the story.

Sunny Days - Move, Move Now

2011-08-18T23:02:00.000-07:00

The call comes from the next room MUMMMMMMMMMMMM, My blanket has fallen off. An innocent call for help from Miss P brings a quick wake up call and a rush to put the blankets back, give her a rub to make her nice and warm and she drifts off to sleep once again. She doesn't understand these 1.30am wake up calls mean a two hour freak out, for her ever caring mother.

I lay myself back down and will Sunny to move, 10 minutes nothing.... Off to the toilet and for a big drink of cold water. I lay myself down again to wait for the important movement at 2am in the morning. Nothing, another big drink and the anxiety builds. My mind races could she have slipped away, could those last movement that I felt as I fell asleep be the last that I will feel of my Sunny girl. 2.15am Out of bed again although this water is not making Sunny move it is going through me, off to the toilet and another drink. By 2.45pm I can no longer lay in bed waiting for the movements so I head off to the TV to distract. Three infomercials later I feel it, I big kick, a wiggle and move. Just give me 10 movements Sunny tell your Mummy that you are OK in there. It is like she has heard me and in minutes I get 10 wonderful movements which tell me she is OK.

I can now breath and lay my head down in my bed knowing that she is OK, to get some sleep and know that the morning is only hours away. Dave thinks that Sunny is going to be so over the pokes and cold water by the time she comes she will be saying Mum leave me alone.

The alarm goes off and I hope that it is Saturday but no it is only Friday. A kick or two from Sunny tells me she is awake, laughing for the girls room tell me they are awake and happy. Time to start the day....

Sunny Days - The Prof

2011-08-10T23:09:00.000-07:00

Photo Taken at 20 weeks

Today was our first appointment with the Prof at Royal Womens he is really lovely which although not really that important, makes it easier for me to have faith that he knows what he is doing for me. It is wonderful that he is going to see me and treat me for the rest of Sunny's pregnancy and is not going to push me off to another Dr. We worked together to find a plan that is going to work for us. This pregnancy is not just medical it is mental. Mental that I'm putting myself and my family through this all again, no actually we knew what we were getting into, by mental I mean a mental journey for me to get to the end with the overriding fear that it could all end in a second.

I had alot riding on today and the anticipation of getting there was so overwhelming last night I felt like I was back in February/March 2010 saying I can't go through this again. The Prof went through the care that I will receive and when I will have ultrasounds and appointments. I now have a plan and a focus. I will have appointments with the Prof every fortnight and before I see him I will have an ultrasound with the best fetal medicine professionals in QLD. This plan works for me right now, two weeks is about my limit before the crazies start over taking my life.

I can only take it as it comes and what works to keep me calm today might not work tomorrow. The only way to get through this is in small steps.

Soundtrack for 2010

2011-08-08T23:00:00.000-07:00

Australian Jordan Millar, I went and saw him in March 2010 and his music became my sound track for 2010. Starting with Recreate You for my Riley Boy and my low days.

To 'Little Birds', Love the line Dark days fade away.

This post is a little hope of redemption from being outed that I'm a massive 80's music fan including Matikka, Madonna and Fleetwood Mac. For mothers day this year Dave got me 1000 80's hits and I love it, I play it all the time.

Sunny Days - Bears of Hope Ball

2011-08-05T16:03:00.000-07:00

This is the second year that I have been on the Bears of Hope Ball Committee. It is the perfect job for me, I get to do all the things I loved most about working, I get to do it from home, I love organising parties and this is one fantastic party and in the process I have made a good Friend in my partner in organisation Jen.
Last year was a crazy three months to organise the ball but this year we are much better organised and know what we are doing. We started working on the ball in February this year with contacting potential businesses for donations. It has been fabulous the response that we have had this year with businesses which we have contacted in the past that where unable to donate, to this year remembering the charity and giving us more then we have ever expected.
Emotionally it is hard to describe the feeling when you get an email or a phone call from a business with a donation. For me it is like that one person has seen the importance of my little angel and the many other little angels and heartache that parents have felt in having to let them go.
The ball is on the 24th September in Sydney this year and althrough I would love to go I will not actually be attending as Sunny and being close to the hospital in Brisbane is very important right now. The night is going to be wonderful with many new things happening and some great annoucements. I know at last count their was only a few tickets left so if you want to go check our the Bears of Hope Website HERE.

And if you are like me and unable to attend or miss out on a ticket I encourage you to donate something that can be put in our lucky dip or auctions. We are looking for items which are $40 - $100 in value for the lucky dips as you can buy a $50 balloon or $100 balloon and get a prize. If you have a blog I encourage you to post about Bears of Hope and encourage others to donate in honour of an angel that has touched your hearts.

It is a great night and a fabulous charity that is operated only by volunteers. The money raised goes to furthering the services available to parents and training of medical staff.

Dogs Life

2011-08-04T16:56:00.000-07:00

When we went for a visit to Sydney one of the best things that Poppy got to do is play with my Mum's new dog Marnie. We are back down in Sydney in September for a quick visit and all Poppy can talk about when I mention Sydney is that she will get to play with Marnie. Here is a Pic of Poppy and Marnie, not sure Marnie is that happy.

Dance Like No One is Watching

2011-08-01T23:51:00.001-07:00

Dance Like No One is Watching a video by Anz2girls on Flickr.

Sunny Days - Three Princesses in Waiting

2011-08-01T19:58:00.000-07:00

Two Little Feet

Well we got through the ultrasound yesterday and there are sure to be more and as they each come I know I only get better with dealing with them. Sunny is fine, she is very active in there kicking around. It was lovely to see. To get through this ultrasound I used some strategies that the Psychologist taught me when I went for a visit a few weeks ago to learn ways to deal with the anxiety. Here are the strategies that work for me:

1. Distraction
2. Plan
3. Get answers straight away
4. Counting
5. Breath
This is what I did to get through and this is what I will continue to do to get through. For the last week I have been so busy doing stuff just to be distracted. I made a plan of the morning, getting the kids off to school and preschool, what time we would leave the house and I had also booked in with the same sonographer as I have had before so that she would understand my anxiety and not just shoo it away. As soon as I lay on the bed I asked the sonographer to show me the heart beating first and then we can go from there. I start counting the things around the room, the roof until I can hear the heart beat. It is only at this point I can start to breath.

Look at those lips (half her face is covered by placenta)

Button Nose

Sunny is definately a girl so my blog name is gong to have to change to Three Princesses in Waiting in the near future.

Sunny Days - It comes in Waves

2011-07-29T23:55:00.000-07:00

The panic comes in waves of 'yes I can deal with this", to "please just get me through the next hour, to the end of the day, until Monday'. Monday marks another ultrasound for us and when it should be exciting all I feel is panic, fear that I'm going to have to live through the nightmare again.
For the last week I have kept as busy as can be, maybe too busy but the tactic of distraction is wonderful with keeping my mind away from being consumed by the monster of fear. It is in the still of night when I can't sleep that the wave gets bigger and bigger and I find myself in bed willing Sunny to move, for her to tell me that she is OK and it is all going to be alright.

Like a mantra Dave tells me often it is all going to be OK that we are going to get to bring Sunny home. Sometimes I can see this and I can pitcure giving birth again but some days when the anxiety is high all I want is to be able to get to the ultrasound and see a healthy baby kicking around in there.

So when you ask me how the pregnancy is going and I say 'Good Today' with smile on my face, I may actually be saying 'Good this second'. Ultrasounds and the lead up to an ultrasound for me are the hardest thing I have to face but I will get through this one and the many more to come and I will get to bring Sunny home.

Sunny Days

2011-07-25T23:37:00.000-07:00

Today I feel strong enough to share a little bit more about me or should I say our family. As I read back through my posts I see the joy and the pain that writing my blog & about Riley has brought to my life, it has been a wonderful way for me to remember all the special little moment in my life and to also share it with others. It has been great to see my life evolve and the change to our life that our move to QLD has also brought.

Lets be honest if I wanted to just keep this all to myself I could, but anyone that knows me knows that I like to share. So today I want to share that I'm pregnant again and I know that for most this would be a wow that is wonderful, are you going to find out what you are having, when are you due etc etc all the question that are normally asked but along with being pregnant again also brings the story of how we got here and the journey that we have to travel to get to the end.

Pushing it out abit at 17 weeks

This is not my 1st pregnancy, 2nd, 3rd or even 4th. This pregnancy is actually my 6th. Doesn't add up when you only see me with two kids. We have Monique, Poppy, Riley and I have experience two miscarriages this year before falling pregnant for the 6th time. I'm very blessed not to have a problem in this department...

My blog is typically a bit of fun and it will continue to be but I also want to be able to share what it is like to pregnant again after losing a child and the joy, excitement, fear and anxiety that come with that.

But today lets go with the feeling of excitment. We are 18 weeks pregnant and I have a little belly happening which is very exciting and I can't wait until I'm huge.

When we told the girls that we are going to have another baby they where excited and had many questions. When we asked Poppy what we are having she told us we are having a girl and her name is Sunny. Hence the "Sunny Days" heading. She is still insisting that the baby's name is Sunny and although it is not what we will call her, it is what her name will be for now.

On the morning that I found out (after being in denial for about two weeks) there was the most beautiful rainbow at my front door as I left to drive the girls to school. As I drove that rainbow didn't disappear but travelled with me and for a moment there I saw the end of the rainbow and knew that it had been sent just for me. The end of the rainbow was within arms reach just as this baby will be.

This is Me

2011-07-20T23:40:00.000-07:00

Looking back to 2009 I see why I started to blog was to document my life. My blog has kind of been an activity journal for the kids and I. So I want to take it back to being a document of my life and all areas of my life. I definately have blogged more this year thanks to a challenge set but a friend and to be honest I have enjoyed it. It gets my thoughts down on paper and out into the world.

There is not much about me as a person on this blog so here is a quick
Top 10 about Ande:
1. I love my family (as if this is not clear)
2. I'm scared of spiders and once called a friend to come over and kill one
3. I drive a little car when we have a bigger car for a couple of reasons but secretly I like to drive it because it is easier to park.
4. I buy chocolate and lollies and hide them from my family so I don't have to share
5. I love naps
6. My hair is 60% grey, I often part my hair different way to get more weeks out of a colour. I have been dying my hair since I was 14.
7. I'd love to live closer to the water, travel to Paris with the girls when they are teenagers and have more shoes
8. Sometimes I really don't feel like cooking dinner so I thinking of the easiest thing to cook and make that. Tonight is Sweet and Sour Chicken out of a jar
9. When I make cookies I make two batches and freeze one so that I can eat frozen cookie dough

10. When I was in year 6, I won the Citzenship Award at school and I was so proud. I have since found out this is not an award for being smart.

Another Theme Park

2011-07-17T19:38:00.000-07:00

Our VIP Passes for Seaworld, WetnWild and Movie World have run out so we have bought the Dreamworld ones for a bit of a change. Last week on the last day of school holidays we took ourselves to explore whilst Dave was at work. Boohoo to him.

First Ride

Wiggle World

Girls Favourite Ride, they went on about 5 times

The best man in the world

2011-07-14T22:34:00.000-07:00

Last night I found out that my darling husband has actually been reading my blog. His only comment on the blog was there is nothing about me (Him). So this post is to the best man in the world and all that he does for our family.

The blue eyes I fell in love with 15 years ago.

The worry lines which 15 years has created.

Bread and Baby

2011-07-14T02:17:00.000-07:00

I took this photo recently of Aunty Liz, my Brother in law Gary and his son Harrison. I didn't realise it at the time until I put all the photos on the computer but this happy photo of Aunt, Nephew and Great Nephew is also in true Gary style.

Please note Gary holding the bread like a baby!

Good One Gaz!!!

Put your Wii Face On

2011-07-10T22:49:00.000-07:00

A little bit of Wii competition brings out the super competitive streak in Monique. Some of her winning reactions.

The Winning Dance

Poppy realising she is not the winner and needs to put her game face on.

Big Eyes and Lots of Photos

2011-07-07T15:31:00.000-07:00

While in Sydney last week I got to take some photos of my neice Cherinda. She is my brother Lawson and sister in law Amy's daughter. She has grown so much since we left. Family members had said to me that she might cry when she saw me as she does with them and there was pretty much no chance of a cuddle. You can see by these photos that there was not a tear in sight. I took a heap of photos, here a just a few.

Our last day at Seaworld

2011-07-07T02:00:00.000-07:00

When we moved to QLD we bought VIP Passes to Seaworld, WetnWild and Movie World. These passes have been fantastic, we have used them so much. I have lost count how many times we have gone to these theme parks. Being so close to the theme parks allowed us to pop down of an afternoon after school for a swim in the wave pool at WetnWild or for the kids to go on a few rides at Movie World. On the down side the girls are so use to going to the theme parks is not that big a treat anymore and more like going to our local park.

On the last day before our passes ran out and we jetted off to Sydney for holidays I took the girls to Seaworld to hang out with my cousins kids. It was pretty busy but loved watching the girls at the Seal Show and at the touch and feel section.

Cheyanne and Aunty Mim. I don't think Cheyanne was enjoying the gondala ride.

Poppy, Kyle, Monique & Cheyanne

New Niece and Nephew

2011-07-06T16:06:00.000-07:00

Baby Harrison is the first child of my brother in law Gary and sister in law Crystal. He was born 10 days over due and is such a cutie. These photos where taken when he was one week old. He looks much older and wiser then his age. A big congratulations to his Mum and Dad as they are sure to be wonderful parents.

Baby Marina is the second child of my brother in law Craig and sister in law Irina, Marina joins her beautiful big sister Chloe who in the last 8 months of us living away from them has grown so much and even more beautiful. My two princesses call Marina a 'Cutie Patootie', she is so petite and such a girl. It was so lovely to go to Sydney and witness the babies being blessed and loved that Marina was blessed with good humour to be able to deal with any of lifes challenges and see the positive side of life.

Photos for School

2011-06-18T23:28:00.000-07:00

I was asked to take some photos for Monique's school uniform shop. Not because they have seen my photography but because I have a good camera. I'm hoping that they are happy with the photos and next time I get asked is because I'm a good photographer not just because I'm the mum that was willing to give up half a day to take photos( or has sucker stuck to my fore head). Monique was one of my models so here are the photos I took of her. Please note these have not been edited.

What does your wife do during the day?

2011-06-13T18:42:00.000-07:00

Our next door neighbour a couple of weeks ago asked Dave. So what does Ande do during the day?
Firstly what a strange question to ask and secondly haven't you seen that have a 4 yr old still at home with me. This has left me pondering what do I do during the day. Well on the days I have Poppy (she is in preschool two days a week) this is my average day:
Get breakfast for kids
Clean the kitchen
Sweep the floor
Pack lunch for school
Get the kids dressed and yell at them to get out of the door
Take them to school
Go to the shops to pick something up that I have usually forgetten to buy in the big grocery shop
Take Poppy to swimming lessons
Clean kitchen again
Feed Kid
clean up mess again
load of washing
vac the house
washing out
think what is for dinner
Bears of Hope work
Quick dash to get Monique from school
Take kids to park
Feed them
Feed them again
Homework
Cook dinner
Feed family
Clean up again
Bath the kids
Get them into bed
Read stories to each of them and get them to sleep.
Thats it, that is what I do on an average day, it is the same thing most days throw in a Dr appointment or extra cleaning or a phone call to a friend. So my lovely neighbour I know it may seem boring but I do lots of stuff and I'm glad I get to stay at home and do it and so it my wonderful husband. Staying at home works for our family and really that is all that matters. After years of not feeling validated as a Stay at Home Mum I'm now more then happy with my choosen career at this time!

Wise Words from Miss M

2011-06-02T21:14:00.000-07:00

Miss M has come up with some very wise words this week.

1. Yelling makes you a Witch
Whilst doing the normal get ready for school, eat your breakfast, get your socks on, get your school bag. Hurry Hurry we are late. Does anyone here hear me? Or as my children call it yelling at them. Miss M observed as we were sitting in the school carpark that 'Mum you better stop yelling or all the kids at school with think that you are a WITCH'.

Well I suppose I do look like a witch when I yell so note taken, no more yelling well at least not for today.

2. Groups at School
Students in Miss M's class have been pulled into groups to do extra work to help them in phonics, speach etc etc but Miss M has not been doing any of this as she doesn't have a problem and is at the top of her class (I Know this because I'm the best mum or witch around). Today she didn't want to get ready for school , when I asked her why she said because she never gets to go in the special groups. Reassuring her I told her I would speak to her teacher. I spoke to her Teacher this morning and she is so sweet she said she had thought about that and wondered if Monique felt left out. So today she is going to make some special group for Monique.

Oh the worries of a smart child.....

How did she go from this

To This

Red Award Day

2011-06-02T00:17:00.000-07:00

Princess M has been waiting all year to be able to get a RED AWARD from school. A few weeks back when Monique had not yet received the Red Award she was very upset and I had to explain to her that if she tries really hard she will get it. The Red Award is given at assembly by the principal. Monique really wanted to get the award not because she wanted the praise but because she wanted to be able to stand up in front of everyone at assembly.

Last week was her week, that was until it rained and assembly got cancelled.

This week was her week along with all the kids from last week and this week. She was so excited and just about to burst with joy.

Weekend in Sydney

2011-05-24T19:51:00.000-07:00

What a whirlwind weekend in Sydney. I felt like I was running from one thing to the next to make sure I could fit it all in.
Friday included:
1. Shopping for new jeans
2. Spending time with my Sister (and my very funny nephew)
3. A Bears of Hope Ball Commitee meeting.
By this point I was running late.
4. Dinner with the Mother Group girls

By this point I was so late it was not funny. We had a lovely dinner and I was very surprised to get home with the clock telling me that Saturday had already started. (Yes they are my new jeans)

Saturday was much more relaxed with a morning at Glenbrook Markets. Or should I say should have been more relaxing. Whilst at Glenbrook markets 'Lib' got her wallet stolen by a pick pocket. Actually she was a dyed blond, mid to late 30 yr old women with a 6 yr old girl. Long story but we know it was her and confronted her, as you do. Nothing came of our confrontation and we ended at the cop shop to report the sneaky thief.

Lib I told you it would be blogged!

Counting down the days

2011-05-17T00:20:00.000-07:00

In two days I will be heading off to Sydney to see Family and Friends for 2 and 1/2 days, I can't wait. This will be the first time ever that I have been away from the girls and Dave. I'm sure I will find something to do like sleep in. Note to self turn off phone, I hate it when you actually get to have a sleep in or a nanna nap and you get woken by a phone call.

I'm excited to be seeing friends which I haven't seen for six months and am so looking forward to the long chats and equally long dinners.

I wish my darling husband luck for this double drop off day and swimming lessons on Friday.

Poppy's Birthday

2011-05-13T15:14:00.000-07:00

So I had to share Mothers day with Princess Poppy. It was a lovely day to share and she was not fussed at all that she had to give me a present before she got hers.

In our house you get to choose what you want to do all birthday weekend. Miss P picked Movieworld.

All Poppy wanted for her birthday was a Jessie Doll from Toy Story. Through much searching I found one and thought that it would complete her collection as she already has Buzz and Woody but no as soon as she opened it she asked 'Where is Bullseye?'

What does a 4 yr old want for her special birthday dinner, Sausages and vegies.

This is Poppy on the phone to my parents after she had just opened the Dollshouse that they gave to her. She actually got on the phone and the first thing she said was Thankyou. I was most impressed!

The Dolls House I won on ebay, brand new for only $57 including postage, I had seen the same one being sold on ebay for $130, Bargin

Mothers Day

2011-05-10T21:42:00.000-07:00

As mothers day this year fell on Princess Poppy's birthday I didn't ask for presents but just what the kids got at school and preschool.
From Monique

When I asked her why she picked this one,she told me that she thought I would like it and it was a rock from Riley too. Some mums may find this a strange gift but i thought this was really sweet. The girls collect rocks for Riley, we have some that have travelled from Sydney with us. To have a little rock with Hope on it is so sweet to me and I'm so happy with my mothers day gift from Monique.

From Poppy, she made a heart at preschool and got her teacher to write what she loves about me. I love to cook almost as much as Poppy loves to eat. Usually when asked what she loves most about mum she will reply with 'she is the best cooker'. My heart is filled with such joy.

I love being a mum

Adventure Drive

2011-05-10T21:23:00.000-07:00

Sometimes we just drive to see what we can find. This is one of the bonuses of having a lease car and having to make sure you do the kilometres. When we lived in Sydney we had no problem doing the km's but in QLD we live much closer to Dave's work so it is long drives to find new things on the agenda for many a weekend.

We headed down the coast to Fingal Bay (I think this is what it is called), just over the boarder. Here are some photos taken at dusk.

Bears of Hope

2011-05-03T01:54:00.000-07:00

On February 2010 we lost our son Riley and it has been great comfort to receive the support from so many wonderful women that have been through it all. I want to pay tribute to the wonderful mums at Bears of Hope, it is a charity that supports families which have lost a child in pregnancy, infancy and miscarriage.

12 months ago I took myself along to my first Bears of Hope Support nights. I was so worried as I drove there, what is is going to be like, what am I meant to say. Is it going to be like some of the support groups you see on TV where you are seated in a circle and have to share your story with everyone. When I arrived it was welcoming, those that I have spoken to on the Bears of Hope forum where there ready to give me a hug and tell me it does get easier with time...

When we moved to QLD I know I would miss this wonderful network of women and my work with Bears of Hope. Distance has not changed the passion I have for this charity and luckily technology means that I'm still able to give back to a charity that gave me so much when my days seemed dark.

A month ago I rang a support group in QLD knowing I needed help and missing Bears of Hope so much. It was so sad to hear the support group Bonnie Babes was closing down and the service and support would no longer be available to greiving families. My desperate phone call turned into me sharing Bears of Hope with Debbie* and she shared her desire to start a charity in QLD that will do the very thing that Bears of Hope have been doing in NSW. As a result of this phone call and continued communication with Bears of Hope this wonderful charity will now be available to Gold Coast families. Thank you Debbie and Bears of Hope.

It is wonderful when you start a chain re-action and see only rainbows in the future.
Want to know more about Bears of Hope or need their support Bears of Hope Infant and Pregnacy Loss Support

Peter Pan

2011-04-30T23:38:00.000-07:00

Last Monday was a public holiday in Qld and we spent the day with my brother in law (John) and sister in law (Kate). After a day at the beach John wanted to go to the skate park. We tagged along and got some photos of John or should I call him Peter Pan. He was the oldest at the skate park by about 18 yrs and also the only one on a skate board.

Here are some photo's of the action

An Unexpected Guest

2011-04-28T13:33:00.000-07:00

After our very relaxing day on Good Friday at the beach we had a very exciting surprise at the front door. Not knowing many people in Qld when you have a knock on the front door you question who it could be. Then the front door opens and I was thinking this is very strange, and a little freaked out by the fact some one that I don't know is opening my front door.

I walked down the stairs to find Chrish our dear friend from NSW had driven 12hrs to just pop over for a visit. It was so lovely and was like we were at home again which Chrish popping over like he lived 10 minutes away. Chrish's day at the beach with us

When the sun shines

2011-04-25T14:44:00.000-07:00

On Friday we got up early and headed for Kurrawa beach, the Gold Coast is full of wonderful beaches and this is one of the best. It is where the annual Surf Lifesaving Carnival is held.

Not a cloud in the sky

We met up with some friends and their girls, we had to make 4 mermaids, our arms and legs were so sore from the digging and the nice sand rash on our knees.

We had such a lovely day and we didn't want it to end.

If I would have a wish!

2011-04-20T17:03:00.000-07:00

If I could have a wish for my family it would be to have lots of fun and laugh alot.

A face to make you laugh

I was writting this in my journal the other day and at that exact moment Miss P walked in with a clown wig on and tried to make me laugh. I love laughter, it is like bubbles that can not be contained that pop and make others laugh as well.

As we enter the easter weekend, I wish that we have a fantastic 5 days filled with laughter and happy memories.

Fairy Garden

2011-04-15T14:34:00.003-07:00

Fairy Garden, a photo by Anz2girls on Flickr.

Toadstool Man

2011-04-15T14:34:00.001-07:00

Toadstool Man, a photo by Anz2girls on Flickr.

Ready for a Fairy Wish

2011-04-15T14:33:00.003-07:00

Ready for a Fairy Wish, a photo by Anz2girls on Flickr.

I wish to ride a unicorn

2011-04-15T14:33:00.001-07:00

I wish to ride a unicorn, a photo by Anz2girls on Flickr.

Lookings for Fairies

2011-04-15T14:32:00.001-07:00

Lookings for Fairies, a photo by Anz2girls on Flickr.

Cross Country

2011-04-12T22:59:00.000-07:00

Monique had her first Cross Country on Tuesday. 800m is a very long run for little kids. Now she didn't come first, she was smart and paced herself. RUN, STOP, PANT, RUN, STOP, PANT she has seen me run way to many times and definately got her running style from me.

So proud that she had fun and kept going until the end, not to mention she didn't come last!

Making the Most of it

2011-04-11T23:03:00.000-07:00

Got to make the most of Rie & Mikie so after a quick lunch we head over to Seaworld for an hour. One of the benefits of living on the Gold Coast is that you can go to the Theme Parks like they are your local park. We have VIP Passes (3 Park Pass) and although a big cost we have really loved having them.

Monique at the Stringray Pool, trying to be brave enough to touch one.

Poppy touching the Stringrays with Rie & Mikie

How do you ride a horse?
Backwards of course

Ice Creams to finish the very exciting day

Rie & Mikie Come for a visit

2011-04-11T22:27:00.000-07:00

The two princesses love Rie and Mikie (their Grandparents, my parents) so much and not seeing them for three months has been tough for both sides. So on Saturday it was an early start as the girls were so excited to see them. Although they didn't arrive until 12.30pm Monique was up before 6am so that she could make a sign to take to the airport. For the last week Poppy had been counting the sleeps.

These photos say it all, the anticipation......

As soon as Monique and Poppy saw Rie & Mikie the sign was thrown on the ground and they ran for a jumping embrace like they had not seen them for years.

The Gallery of Modern Art - finally we are here

2011-04-08T15:38:00.000-07:00

Finally after all of the other culture we stumbled across we made it to the GoMA

(as we people that are cultured call it)

This was taken on the was to GoMA, Whale Mall.

Now Let me just say that alot of Modern Art is just STRANGE!

Some of the things that we saw included a film of a fat man rocking in a rocking chair STRANGE! A film of 12 people doing Michael Jackson impersonations, this was funny and Monique's favourite of the day. There was a room filled with purple balloons which you walk through. The line was too long so we moved onto the next 'ART' work.

We no less then 5 times got into trouble by staff at the GoMA
1. Poppy climbed on to the ice of a headless iceskating man (another strange one)
2. I took a photo using my flash, of these fantastic balls and so glad that I did...
3. Poppy once agian tried to climb onto the artwork
4. David touched something
5. David built his lego tower really tall and was told it was dangerous

Yes the pattern is of Sperm

Lego Table

Our day of culture was done and dusked our next Adventure Day is David's pick, we will be looking forward to Football Day or Fishing Day.

At the Museum

2011-04-08T14:52:00.000-07:00

We popped into the museum on the way to the Art Gallery as once again it was free. The girls love Dinosaurs and this is Monique's impression of a T-Rex.

We then measured Monique to make sure she is not a 'Hobbit'. Glad to say that is taller then a Hobbit.

But as we have always thought Poppy is a Hobbit

It was a very quick visit to the musuem and we will definately be going back. We love FREE activities and with school holidays in a week we will be looking for things to do.

My little dinosaurs
Have appropriate that it is Dinosaur Monique chasing Dinosaur Poppy