Friday, March 19, 2010

I don't want to know the speed limit


I rang David he was on the way and told him that our baby had no heart beat and he cried and drove so fast to be by my side. I regret having to tell him on the phone but i could not bear that burben by myself until he got there. I have spoken to him since and asked what was running through your mind. He said that he just had to get to the hospital as fast as he could and he just hoped that i was wrong and that Riley still had a chance. I can not imagine what it was like for him to drive and not be able to get to me fast enough. If it was me i would be yelling at every car in front of me to move out of the way, i would be praying that every light was green and there was a parking spot waiting for me. I would want to run if it meant that I would get there a second faster.




David's face when he walked into the room was one of hope, mine was of dispair. How we can communicate without words, his face dropped when he saw me. All i could say was I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry that we have lost, I'm so sorry that i was not a better mum, so sorry that I could not protect our son.




All David needed to say to comfort me at this time was 'I LOVE YOU'.


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I'm a stay at home mum to three beautiful girls and one angel boy which inspire me to be a better person every day. My Blog is about our life and suviving the up and downs of raising a family and the love and loss that come along for the journey.