Showing posts from August, 2011

Losing Track

Busy Busy life, each day I write a to do list and sometimes I get through it other times I'm so busy that I lose my to do list and end up doing a whole heap of other things I need to do which may or may not have been on my to do list in the first place. Only to get to the next day and write another to do list and start the cycle all over again.

I few weeks ago I sat at church and listened to a talk by a young mum of two boys about how we raise our families and how busy our lives can get. I have been thinking about her talk since then and she made a wonderful point, we write a to do list but do be write a TO BE LIST.
As a women what do I want to be?
As a mother what do I want to be?
As a wife what do I want to be?
As a friend what do I want to be?
 These question make you think about yourself and what you are leaving with each person you touch. In High School it is all about making an impression about being in the 'In Crowd', as you get older you realise these things don'…


Being Queenslanders now we had to experience the EKKA, which is like the Sydney Royal Easter Show other then you can actually walk around.Here are some photo's and my attempt to edit the images. I hope to in the future have the time and patience to edit my photos properly. But for now I like the carnival effect that I have created with these.

 These have not been edited but I love the the girls faces as I was trying to take a nice photo of them and David. All I can say is at least they love each other.

Sunny Days - Face The Fear

We are now on fortnightly ultrasounds for Sunny which is wonderful that I get to see her beautiful face every two weeks. She is just so lovely and I just can't wait to be able to carry her out of the hospital in my arms, all safe and sound and healthy. To be able to trace my fingers over her nose and those kissable lips. With ultrasounds every two weeks it means I will have to be doing them alone, which takes me back to having Riley and waiting for the bad news that would tell us he had passed away. You would think that having such regular ultrasounds is reassuring and it is, but I know that it can all change without notice. You can go from having movements and a heartbeat to heart break, So while it is great to see her every second Thursday and be able to get a great collection of photos, that reassurance doesn't last long. I soon enough find myself waiting for the movements to tell me she is still in there and alive.
The care I'm getting at the hospital is fantastic and …

9 Inches?

Anyone that is an AFL fan will see the funny side of this picture. Only on the Gold Coast!

Ready to Ride

One of the many benefits of being pregnant is I don't have to go on the rides at the theme parks. Dave is not a massive fan of rides that spin you around and around but these are the things that we do for our kids. The pictures tell the story.

Sunny Days - Move, Move Now

The call comes from the next room MUMMMMMMMMMMMM, My blanket has fallen off. An innocent call for help from Miss P brings a quick wake up call and a rush to put the blankets back, give her a rub to make her nice and warm and she drifts off to sleep once again. She doesn't understand these 1.30am wake up calls mean a two hour freak out, for her ever caring mother.

I lay myself back down and will Sunny to move, 10 minutes nothing.... Off to the toilet and for a big drink of cold water. I lay myself down again to wait for the important movement at 2am in the morning. Nothing, another big drink and the anxiety builds. My mind races could she have slipped away, could those last movement that I felt as I fell asleep be the last that I will feel of my Sunny girl. 2.15am Out of bed again although this water is not making Sunny move it is going through me, off to the toilet and another drink. By 2.45pm I can no longer lay in bed waiting for the movements so I head off to the TV to distract.…

Sunny Days - The Prof


 Today was our first appointment with the Prof at Royal Womens he is really lovely which although not really that important, makes it easier for me to have faith that he knows what he is doing for me. It is wonderful that he is going to see me and treat me for the rest of Sunny's pregnancy and is not going to push me off to another Dr. We worked together to find a plan that is going to work for us. This pregnancy is not just medical it is mental. Mental that I'm putting myself and my family through this all again, no actually we knew what we were getting into, by mental I mean a mental journey for me to get to the end with the overriding fear that it could all end in a second.

I had alot riding on today and the anticipation of getting there was so overwhelming last night I felt like I was back in February/March 2010 saying I can't go through this again. The Prof went through the care that I will receive and when I will have ultrasounds and appointments. I now have a pl…

Soundtrack for 2010

Australian Jordan Millar, I went and saw him in March 2010 and his music became my sound track for 2010. Starting with Recreate You for my Riley Boy and my low days.
To 'Little Birds', Love the line Dark days fade away. This post is a little hope of redemption from being outed that I'm a massive 80's music fan including Matikka, Madonna and Fleetwood Mac. For mothers day this year Dave got me 1000 80's hits and I love it, I play it all the time.

Sunny Days - Bears of Hope Ball

This is the second year that I have been on the Bears of Hope Ball Committee. It is the perfect job for me, I get to do all the things I loved most about working, I get to do it from home, I love organising parties and this is one fantastic party and in the process I have made a good Friend in my partner in organisation Jen.
Last year was a crazy three months to organise the ball but this year we are much better organised and know what we are doing. We started working on the ball in February this year with contacting potential businesses for donations. It has been fabulous the response that we have had this year with businesses which we have contacted in the past that where unable to donate, to this year remembering the charity and giving us more then we have ever expected.
Emotionally it is hard to describe the feeling when you get an email or a phone call from a business with a donation. For me it is like that one person has seen the importance of my little angel and the many other l…

Dogs Life

When we went for a visit to Sydney one of the best things that Poppy got to do is play with my Mum's new dog Marnie. We are back down in Sydney in September for a quick visit and all Poppy can talk about when I mention Sydney is that she will get to play with Marnie. Here is a Pic of Poppy and Marnie, not sure Marnie is that happy.

Dance Like No One is Watching

Sunny Days - Three Princesses in Waiting

Well we got through the ultrasound yesterday and there are sure to be more and as they each come I know I only get better with dealing with them. Sunny is fine, she is very active in there kicking around. It was lovely to see. To get through this ultrasound I used some strategies that the Psychologist taught me when I went for a visit a few weeks ago to learn ways to deal with the anxiety. Here are the strategies that work for me: 1. Distraction
2. Plan
3. Get answers straight away
4. Counting
5. Breath
This is what I did to get through and this is what I will continue to do to get through. For the last week I have been so busy doing stuff just to be distracted. I made a plan of the morning, getting the kids off to school and preschool, what time we would leave the house and I had also booked in with the same sonographer as I have had before so that she would understand my anxiety and not just shoo it away. As soon as I lay on the bed I asked the sonographer to show me the heart beatin…