I have finally found some time to post, last friday we welcomed the arrival of Josephine Adelaide , you might know her as 'Sunny'. Weight 3095 Date of Birth 2/12/2011 Length: 50cm She is so lovely and we are so glad to have her with us finally. What a long road. As I have time I will continue to write about my girls and what it was like to be 37 weeks pregnant and then to actually deliver her and bring her home. The anticpation and emotions are something which I don't want to ever forget. Here are some Pictures of our beautiful girl.
I started to blog when a became pregnant with Riley and now, it is one of the few things i have to remember him by. We lost our darling little boy on 16th February 2010 at 31 weeks. I had a feeling that something was not right, that he hadn't moved much in the days leading up to his arrival so called the hospital and was told to come straight in to get checked out. I was concerned but thought that everything would be OK. Riley didn't move much or maybe is was that i'm always so busy that i only ever noticed it at night when i went to bed. When i was pregnant with the girls; we would see feet sticking out, so clearly that you could count their toes. This never happened with Riley and I put it down to being a different baby, he never really bothered me much at all. I was much less sick with Riley then i was with the girls that is for sure. I had to carry zip lock bags with me every where with the girls and with Riley I was sick but he always allowed me enough time to get to...
The panic comes in waves of 'yes I can deal with this", to "please just get me through the next hour, to the end of the day, until Monday'. Monday marks another ultrasound for us and when it should be exciting all I feel is panic, fear that I'm going to have to live through the nightmare again. For the last week I have kept as busy as can be, maybe too busy but the tactic of distraction is wonderful with keeping my mind away from being consumed by the monster of fear. It is in the still of night when I can't sleep that the wave gets bigger and bigger and I find myself in bed willing Sunny to move, for her to tell me that she is OK and it is all going to be alright. Like a mantra Dave tells me often it is all going to be OK that we are going to get to bring Sunny home. Sometimes I can see this and I can pitcure giving birth again but some days when the anxiety is high all I want is to be able to get to the ultrasound and see a healthy baby kicking around in ...
aren't kids amazing?
ReplyDeletefind a bronze woman have a chat!
i do that and just look plain crazy :)
i never want to grow up xx